don’t let anybody mine your gold for free!

Women get labelled for wanting a financially stable man. But men? They’ll target your emotional labor, your womb, your time, your peace, your submission, your caregiving energy, your passport, your degree, your ambition. They dig for things that benefit them long-term. And the craziest part? They do it while making you feel like you’re lucky to have them.

They’ll call it love, but it’s really labor - unacknowledged, unpaid, and often unreciprocated.

They’ll shame you for having standards while expecting you to heal their wounds, mother their egos, tolerate their confusion, be loyal while they "figure it out”, “tolerate their excesses”, and “be mute to their misbehaviours”. 

Men would dig for your loyalty during their broke phase. They dig for your body while promising a future. They dig for your domestic skills while calling it “wifey material.” They dig for your silence while abusing your patience. 

They want you to birth their kids, raise them, build their home, cook, clean, and support their dreams, even if they don’t support yours.

They don’t call it gold digging. They call it “looking for a real woman.”
But let’s be clear, they are the professional diggers.
And many women don’t even realize they’re being mined. Why? Because the man isn’t asking for cash, but he's taking things more valuable than money - your time, your body, your energy, youth, your intellect, and purpose
So before anyone tries to shame you for “gold digging,” ask yourself what the man is digging for. 
Because if we’re being honest, men have been digging gold in silence for generations, just not in naira or dollars, but in emotional labor and life sacrifices.

Watch closely. Ask questions. Guard your value. 

And don’t let anybody mine your gold for free!

Omobolanle Adeyemo